Ok, so rehearsals started for our "Best Of" Under Six Mini-Tour. Which is great, because they've certainly picked some very good pieces of work for us to dive into. I won't reveal them just yet, because I'm still taking my first bites into the scripts...we'll see what juice we find towards the middle.
Today ended up being rather stressful. I work in the Box Office as my secondary duties--which in and of itself can be plenty explanatory. I came home in a bit of a funk. Ate food. That felt good. Laid on the couch. Felt even better. Then, I made myself go over to see the FST Improv troope.
Oh man, are they funny.
I know a performance or work has really gotten to me when the emotion just wants to jump out of my throat before I can stop it. It's so nice to be the audience for a chance and have someone twang on your laughter chords until it hurts. I find laughing a necessary thing: keep the world in a tiny corner and let the kid free for awhile. It's hard to think of a time that laughing didn't help to soften and brighten. One of the best stress relievers I know. Honestly, just being around a good performance can often inspire my own acting. (A bad performance can also be just as liberating, but I can get into that later as well). It got me diving into my own acting homework right before I started writing to you. I was able to take one step back, and got five steps forward. Never ceases to amaze.
One thing that I've seen that's tricky for an actor is knowing when to let go of something. Anything. There's lines in the sand I've drawn for myself so I know what my limits are as an actor and as a person. But again, that line we draw when it's just ourselves gets oh so much more complicated when other people are involved. And, when something isn't working, it's often been the best for me to take a step back and turn off the brain--which has sometimes been a mammoth struggle as the young, frail, fledgling actor that I am, with the constant worries of adulthood survival, the fear of losing passion, losing faith in my process, and all the other things that come with risking for a big dream.
Tonight it came down to getting a good laugh. Someone else's artistic expression became the relief against the struggles within my own.
Just something to think about.
-Ben
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